Getting Rid of the Baggage

I'm so proud of myself and yet sad as well. I have this problem with burning bridges...I don't like doing it. I always think: If I walk away then what could have happened?

Here's the scoop: I'm still in contact with most of the men I've dated. They all still have at least one way to contact me. And they all do because I'm reluctant to burn bridges. Until two weekends ago I've never said, "Don't ever contact me again" for reasons other than the threat of violence. But I threw my shoulders back on Saturday and got rid of two men, kinda.

The first was Adian*. We've actually been actively (at least in his eyes) dating for over 2 years. We'd said the "L" word several times to one another. The problem: He lives several states away and kept making promises to move back home (we're from the same hometown). After months, literrally like 9 (!), of these promises I decieded that it was too painful and began to pull back from him. Of course (since I'm such a chicken shit) I didn't just say that to him, I just started living my life as though he only existed when he called. I did stop telling him that I loved him though. I also wrote 2 emails over 3 months asking him to come home or let me go. Whatever...long story short I broke up with him over text messaging, because he wouldn't call me on the phone. He's hurt, I'm a bitch. I even told him that he could call anytime (I didn't mean it).

The second was Trouble*. Yes I actually called him that to his face. For 2 years we dated (and by dated I mean had sex on every available surface). He is married. I hadn't had sex with him for over a year but he was the most presistant man on the face of the planet. He showed up at my job for the 2nd time in a row and I just could not handle him. Once he leaves I text him and tell him that I'm "now attempting to get this over with". He lets go without a fight.

And that is that. I now have 2 less hearts to consider.


* names changed (even though no one is reading this but me)