Anniversary

My parents just celebrated their 34th wedding anniversary. No one is as shocked as my mother but us kids are a close runner up. Not to spread all my parents' business on the world wide web but they are night and day...my mother is the night. And while I'm happy for them (34 years is a long time!) I'm also jealous and jaundiced.

When they were my age my parents had been married for 5 years and had a child. Sure it was a different time...but is it that different? The more milestones they make the more I doubt that I'll ever make those.  Granted neither of my parents went to college or had even had time to think of it.  They had little to no money and wouldn't for at least another five years. Then there were more children, more bills.  

Now I'm living the life my parents want for me.  An education, a job, a home and "money" (or the potential to make money).  But I have a longing for what they had - a purpose.

When will it be my turn to even start a 34 year union?

sweet night

I'm fueling my fire with caffeine this morning because of my night. I have been dating Gator for almost 4 months. And while it sounds ridiculous, at this moment, 3 weeks ago I was insisting on a "relationship" from Gator (yes I really call him that...he likes the Florida Gators). After much analyzing and agonizing I decided to back off, but that's another blog. This blog is about last night.

The best way to describe is was sweet. Okay so I'm at home, thinking about cleaning, when I get a text (this is our major mode of communication). He wants to know what I'm doing..."supposed to be cleaning," I text back from bed. My cleaning had been only a plan. So he asks if I want to go out with him and some of his friends. Of course I do! So I grab a bite to eat, pick out an outfit, hop in the shower, make up and all that jazz...I'm out of my house in a record hour and a half. I find a rocking parking spot (it was a sign!), then I proceed to the bar where they are.

Okay so here's the run down. His friends are all in couples! Its his roommate, "M" and M's girlfriend (of about a year) and then another couple K & K's girlfriend (they talked about their wedding but I saw no ring). At different parts of the evening (together and independent) both girls tell me that Gator has been talking to everyone about me (tiny squeal). Apparently M's girl had talked Gator into inviting me "I told him to just ask you! I wanted to finally met you!" and he agreed (text: "Me & the clan r goin' d'town 4 awhile...wanna join us?...").

We hung out at one bar and then moved to another. Gator and I fell into a comfortable couple mode. We joked, posed for pictures, we danced, held hands, and we kissed. It was awesome. It felt so good to just be with him. It always does but last night I had let go. I had decided that I was gonna give him the space that he needed and take the pressure off myself and it just felt great to not have to analyze every single thing he said or to try to remember his facial expression so that I could dissect it over the phone with my closest girlfriends.

At the end of the night he walked me to my car (sweet) and he kissed me (so sweet) and he thanked me for coming out...and of course I thanked him for inviting me and kissed him back (ever so sweetly) then I waited until his friends came to the bottom of the garage to pick him up.

Such a sweet night.